We’ve been sitting on our hands here, watching the total collapse of our sport – no regattas here, no sailing there, and all of it due to the overreaction to the so-called Covid-69 virus. From our perspective, it just all adds up to a load of bollocks. So, as you might expect from us, we say fuck it.
Though the dates are not completely confirmed, we are going to hold the First Annual Sailing Anarchy Never Mind The Bollucks Regatta, in San Diego, sometime in June. There will be no yacht club involved, there will be no bullshit governing bodies telling us what we can and can’t do. The rules will be simple, including automatic disqualification for anyone who actually dares to bring a protest to us. You fuckers will settle all differences on the water. Maybe the parking lot, we don’t care. Ratings will be based on PHRF, but modified by someone who knows shit from shinola: ME.
We’re gonna hold it in the South Bay, with smooth water, consistent breeze and no wussies looking up our skirt with a flashlight.
Unable to secure any sponsors at this point, we’ll just have a hefty entry fee, but accompanied by strippers pouring unlimited shots of rum and tequila at the undisclosed “gathering place”.
Entries will be limited, as we don’t want to create too much of a shit storm, and certainly there will be one. But in accordance with one of our life philosophies, “It’s better to beg for forgiveness than to ask for forgiveness.”
april fool’s day!