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you're going to what?

I was getting rid of some old sailing shirts when I came across this from my Transpac on the SC 52 Pressure Cooker in 1995. Great boat, great crew, good times….right up until about two-thirds of the way to Hawaii. It had been a bit of a slow race, and that alone was no big deal, except that I had a very Big Deal on a very specific day waiting for me. And it looked like we would not finish in time for me (and the entire crew) to attend.
The Big Deal? I was getting married in Hawaii. And I was going to miss my own wedding! But of course I was. That’s what was expected of me anyway!
So after consulting with Naviguesser Jon Shampain to confirm our likely ETA, owner Jeff Chandler handed me his sat phone to make The Call. Now normally, half the crew would be asleep and I could find a place to make a quiet call to my bride to be and tell her the bad (or maybe good) news.
But oh no, not this crew. Good friends all, they gathered around me to hear this call because they knew it had disaster written all over it. And of course they demanded that I use the speaker phone. They were busting my balls and laughing at me, showing the kind of support that only dear friends can provide. High fiveing and having great joy at my expense, they waiting as the phone rang. She answered and, swallowing hard I said, “Um, honey? We are sitting in the middle of the Pacific and I may miss the wedding date.”
Surely the yelling was about to commence, but she ruined all my crew-mates planned fun by saying “That’s okay honey, when do you think you’ll be in?” I covered the mouthpiece and told them all to suck my dick with great glee. They started cat calling and yelling things like “he planned this!” and “he didn’t want to get married anyway!”It actually was very, very funny and needless to say, I felt a hell of a lot better about missing my own wedding.
How did it end, you ask? The breeze filled in, we hauled ass and made it with a day to spare! The traditional Hawaiian wedding was sweet and lovely, and a good time was had by all! But to think how badly this could have turned out….Good thing I have Jeebus on my side.
– ed.