faster than a kenyan on meth

One of the all-time great Craigslist ads. We need to hire this guy!
For Sale: One 1981 Catalina Sailing Boat with Tall Rig with an 11 horse power diesel engine. Bottom line, this beast is a sick ride! In fact I’d even say it’s the ultimate party barge and upon its solid decks you would undoubtedly be crowned king of the marina. Don’t be surprised if the loch ness monster rises out of the waves and bows in humble adoration as you sail on past.
Wait, is that a mermaid in the background? Damn straight! Because the Catalina 27 was considered the seaside pimp of its day, Who be yer crew, don’t be a fool, sailing is cool.
Is it fast? Ever heard of old school autos with 3-on-the-tree? Well, this shearwater screamers got 2-on-the-timber. That’s right, sloop rigged and ready to rock, and not just a plain jane sloop, this water rocket is masthead rigged mean’n the Genny goes all the way to the tippy-top of the skyscraper style mast. Hanging all that extra sail makes her part the waves as if Moses himself was at the helm.
Snappin’ necks and chill’n on the decks, homie…No problem. Just look at this beast. It even has the original factory pin striping. This America’s Cup style speed demon will look quick just sitting in your slip at the marina. Neighbors be like “shut-my-mouth” with envy. Don’t dare put this baby under a tarp for the winter, She deserves the garage.
Does it run, you ask? HELL YEAH! Like a pack of Kenyans on crystal meth! This bad boy got a rock solid Universal diesel so you can go even when the wind don’t blow. Two brand new batteries installed. Turns over quicker than a prom date. And you don’t even need to buy it wine coolers. Won’t need to mortgage the house to fill the fuel tank every week with this sweetie, She sips go-juice at just a short quart an hour. Equipped with all the necessary boat gear such as life jackets, anchor, plenty of dock lines, marine VHF radio, compass, and a stereo system that will make your ears bleed.
Don’t get me started on how she sails. 27 feet precision slicin’ and dicin’. Cuts through the wind and water better than Edward Scissor Hands and Lorena Bobbit in a knife fight. This blade runner has two reef points on her battened main hanging on the mast and a 130 Genoa on a Harken Roller up front. Down below is a solid lead fin keel that makes her point like an Irish Setter and keeps things so stable you’d think you was being rocked to sleep in your mammas arms.
But do I need another 10-G’s to get her going? You ask. Not a chance shipmate! All you have to do is drop this twenty seven feet of fiberglass freedom in the water and you are ready to go. Now let’s be honest, I’m sure you’ll want to trick her out to meet your personal style, but this thoroughbred is ready to run as is.
Pretty sure this water-ride is the luxury model. It’s equipped with a plush foam ride cabin seats giving you comfort deluxe to cushion your bum or rest your bones when the sailing done and the bottle is dry
Equipped with a high gloss wooden Kung Fu grip tiller and a cockpit arranged for easy access to every line you need to make this baby go. No soft spots on her textured decks. Ain’t no footloose goin’ on up here. Safety first, homies!
You: So how much is this freshwater love machine?
Me: Just $6000.°°.
You: Wait, what?
Me: That’s right, you heard me, only $6000 greenbacks.
The world: How is that possible?
Me: my family and I have enjoyed using this sexy seadog for the past six years but life brings changes and this seabird needs to open her white wings again and explore new horizons. It’s time this dimond set sail and find another crew to roll with. It’s explored more of the great lakes than Father Marquette himself and is looking for new destinations with a deserving crew
Don’t wait to call or you’ll be tellin’ stories about the one that got away for the rest of your life, contact me now and become the salty skipper you always dreamed to be. Ad here.