bro bro bro your boat

We get some hilarious shit via e-mail and this is the best of the week…
You down with Bro P P?
Dude, I mean bro! It is a totally brodacious day, and my testosterbrone is raging!
When I sent in my broposal to US Sailing, I figured these brotards would not be down with the brogram, but bro, they turned out to be bromeigos!
And their check isn’t bad either, bro. And I only live 20 miles away, as the bro flies!
Some think I’m not brophisticated enough for you sailor types, that I know nothing about the brocean, but bro, I’m like Brohammed Ali of the sailing. I’m so rad, I might change my name to Josh Brolin!
And yeah, I always wear dopey shit like this on my head; I’m not ready for brogain yet! Or even brotox!
Okay bro, we’ll see you at the US Sailing Leadership Forum, or as I like to call it, Game of Brones!
Got anything to add to this??? – ed
Here, thanks to newb Anarchist Loose Cannon, is the best response, by far!
Dude is Brotally Brover qualified for this gig, what with his douchtacular soul patch an nearly bro”d lip caterpillar.   If he had more than five followers on Twatter and his entire Facebook posse hadn’t Unfriended him he could almost pass as any hipster idiot fucking up my coffe at Starbucks.  
Dude doesn’t know shit about sailing as far as anyone has reported (can you even imagine him getting on a ferry without yodeling groceries) and probably can’t tell his seo from his bo, but maybe he won a virtual regatta with the help of one of his 16 roommates who wrote him a bot.
With the media talents that are also amazing sailors ready to rescue the sport if they are just asked, why, oh why….   Clean, please ask him some questions the way that senator did to trumps judicial appointment and make him cry for his momma.