the retarded games

Sailing is retarded to those who don’t understand it. And even when they do, it’s still retarded…
Because the Olympics is the world’s greatest viewing buffet, I went back for seconds this morning and sampled some sailing, a sport that doesn’t get much coverage on television for reasons that become immediately obvious. To say sailing is confusing is like saying Michael Phelps is comfortable in the water. And it doesn’t help that the international feed features no commentators, presumably because everybody who knows how to describe the Mixed Narca 17 (multihull) race I watched today was presumably sailing in it.
Thus, I was left to my own devices to try and figure out the most baffling sport in the Summer Games. Join me on my odyssey. Read on.