Former San Francisco politician and now barkeep was one of the city’s biggest naysayers in the negotiations for AC34, and with the City being ‘pumped and dumped’ as a possible AC35 venue, Peskin is clearly feeling vindicated, and, well, a bit punchy. And yesterday, he penned the “Top Ten Reasons AC Banners Are Still Flying Over SF” that gave us a little chuckle. From SFGate’s blog:
10. Larry Ellison demanding taxpayers give him $11.5 million more just to make him go away.
9. Cup Banners hiding sacks of lead weights Team Oracle used to “speed things up a bit”
8. Port likes to pretend things it doesn’t like never happened – see secret plans to revive 8 Washington
7. First C.W. Nevius has to write another bizarre column blaming NIMBYs for everything
6. Ed Lee hoping “America’s Cup Success” banner is his version of “Mission Accomplished”
5. Top Port officials don’t even live in SF so they never noticed banners still there
4. David Chiu hoping banner maintenance can fulfill his mayoral campaign promises that “America’s Cup has already created thousands of local jobs right here!”
3. Just a few more layers of car exhaust and dirty banners will blend in perfectly with piers
2. Larry Ellison cemented banners on with his super-fancy “billionaire yacht glue”
1. Ed still waiting for the ok sign from Willie and Rose.
In other America’s Cup news, Coutts was seen at the Chicago Yacht Club yesterday; ostensibly scouting out his new office space…We’re going to throw our endorsement behind the Windy City as our top choice for the Cup, and we encourage you to do the same. Why? How about our own serious Top Ten list?
SA’s Top Ten Reasons For Oracle To Hold An America’s Cup in Chicago:
10. Bermuda’s costume is possibly the stupidest national dress in the universe. Worse than Burkhas. No one can take a year of those shorts.
9. Bermuda’s sharks and big reef fish would play havoc with AC62 foils.
8. The Editor would be angry for two years if SD got taken over by Coutts and his minions.
7. SD Kelp + foiling = uh-oh.
6. No more mammal slaughter; AC34 killed literally tons of seals, sea lions, and dolphins.
5. Chicago’s hipster population is minimal.
4. Chicago is way closer to Clean’s house, meaning SA might actually cover the 35th AC.
3. Don Wilson is smarter than the entire San Francisco City Board of Supervisors, and should be able to drive a good bargain.
2. 2 of the 4 Americans currently sailing for Cup teams are (more or less) local.
And the number one reason to have AC35 in Chicago:
1. Late night lead ‘modifications’ to Oracle’s boats will weigh more in fresh water.
June 19th, 2014